Time to bring in the Meds

it sucks that it had to come to that. But i cant do it any more just by myself. I cant run myself into the ground to keep other things off of my mind. I need the help. Normal outlets that worked before have little or no effect on me. That's what's upsetting. Or maybe i worked myself up really good. Maybe i have gotten into a path that is destructive to my health. I probably should take a class on how to relax. 

I think i am going to have to do some pleading with strangers. To have faith and let me in. Faith that i can do the job that another department thought that i was qualified that i could complete at their school. Doesn't that count for something? What does a standardized test evaluate? It doesn't measure anything i have learned in the classroom in any upper level classes that i have taken. it is completely un-useful to anyone.